Sub-prime Crisis and Financial Innovation

Back after a long hiatus! This time with a topic of world interest these days: Finance and Economy. Let us try to understand what exactly was the role of investment banks and financial institutions (and, if possible, the government) in bringing about the current economic crisis.

Financial innovation is a process of introduction of new financial products, for investors and for people seeking debt capital. If used in an apposite manner, they bring about increased efficiency and options to their users - ATMs and internet banking for example. Some financial innovation is specifically adopted to avoid or circumvent regulation. In the case of MBS (Mortage-backed Securities... Yes.. You have heard this term before), possibly that might be the case.

Let us take an example to understand what an MBS is. Suppose Kolya clears his MBA in two years [:)], gets a good job in the USA [:))] and gets an amazing salary [:D] (Highly unlikely given the current economic scenario). He gets married to his beautiful girlfriend [:O] and wants to purchase a home. He goes to a Government sponsored enterprise (GSE) like the Federal Home Loan Bank Corporation (Freddie Mac.. A famous name that went bust in the crisis - though it got bailed out by the US government, and is currently placed in conservatorship of the US government: US taxpayers' money used to bail out a privately owned institution - yes, it is a GSE but it is a private institution after all), and asks for a loan. Now what is the process through which these loans are generated? The general public (let us call them investors) deposit their money with Freddie Mac, to diversify their portfolio of investments, since Freddie Mac is a GSE and considered to expose investors to some (albeit very little) credit risk. So let us suppose Tarantula deposits a sum of 1 million dollars in Freddie Mac and gets some securities called Mortgage-backed Securities (There are many such investors who buy such securities from Freddie Mac, considering that it is considered quite a low-risk enterprise). And Kolya wants a bank loan of 1 million dollars for his home. So Kolya will go to Freddie Mac, show that he is employed and is capable enough of paying his mortgage dues, and will get the home loan. His job goes on well for two years and he keeps his promise. Monthly installments go to the Freddie Mac, which takes some portion of it and passes on the rest of the money to Tarantula as the return on his investment. Say, the loan period is 10 years. If everything goes well, then Tarantula will get his returns by this method each month, while Kolya will get his home loan. Amazing concept.

But this is where the assumptions that go behind this scenario become important. Suppose Kolya goes berserk, and no one wants to give him a job now. He can't pay his monthly bills and can't be expected to pay off his mortgage. Obviously, Freddie Mac would have already considered this scenario and can take possession of the house he bought if necessary and get their loan's worth. There are always some bad loans and this is one such scenario. However, the overall portfolio of Freddie Mac is still well-diversified because most of the people who have taken loans from it are still paying their installments. So all is well and fine. But then, where does the problem lie?

The problem lies in the assumption that Freddie Mac will be able to recover their money from the 1 million dollar house. For that, either its value has to increase over time or it has to remain constant. And this is one assumption that can be considered as the single biggest factor of the entire crisis. Suppose real estate prices come down and the house can only be sold for 500000 dollars. Then what about the rest of the money that is still left? It goes down into the "bad loans" account in the books of Freddie Mac and that is it.

Obviously, in normal days also, such things might happen. But that includes only a limited portion of the loan-takers. In the "sub-prime" case, the people who took the loans did not necessarily have the ability to pay off the loans and the number of such people was very high. The real estate prices go down simultaneously (because of so many defaulters). So Freddie Mac is left with many houses and no money to pay off its investors. The result is obvious.

The question arises: Was it only the assumption of stable real estate prices that was responsible for this crisis? Certainly not. The role of the government is a big issue. At the turn of the millenium, US was growing at a decent pace. Unemployment was quite low and the government wanted to ensure that everybody has a home. A good intention. Hence, the Federal Reserve Bank ensured that there is a lot of money in the system which can be given on credit to the people in need of homes. However, the assumptions mentioned above were not taken care of and the world economy has been brought to the brink of a recession. Somebody rightly said about the crisis: Good intentions do not necessarily give out good results.

While we are at it, let us also consider the role of investment banks. The fixed-income securities (because they give a fixed return every month) that Freddie Mac issues are sold in the market by the investment banks to its clients. So the process goes like this: An investor invests in Freddie Mac, who provides the securities to investment banks in return for funds, which it gives for loans, while the investment banks sell those securities. Investment banks significantly affect demand for these securities. (Let us not consider Structured Investment Vehicles, etc. here... I would like to keep this as simple as possible.. You can read more at http://subprimer.org/node/13). Investment banks, with their trading divisions, make bets using their own money too. Hence, eventually, investment banks also went down with the subprime crisis.

So what could have been done? Till now, everything was fact. What follows is personal opinion. The first thing that comes to my mind on reading everything above is the fact that if the amount of money supply in the market was limited, such that banks and financial institutions did not have as much money to invest as they had, possibly they would have shown a certain amount of restraint in giving money to people without pertinent checks on the ability of those people to repay the loans. This follows from a very fundamental behaviour principle: If I have too much of something, I would have a tendency of not caring too much. If I don't have as much of it, I would use it properly. That does not mean that the Federal Reserve Bank should have sucked all the excess liquidity in the system, but just that the amount of liquidity should have been limited.

The second thing is the role of investment banks and financial institutions. Because of lack of regulation on the activities of these financial insititutions, the money of general public is being played with. Loan providing institutions like banks did not check the credibility of people whom they gave loans to. The investment banks vehemently went on increasing the demand of the highly risk mortgage-backed securities without even looking at the risks involved. Even when a simple government bond is considered, a lot of risks are measured and then a decision on whether to invest or not is taken:
1. Interest rate risk: Effect of changes in prevailing market rate of interest
2. Yield curve risk: Risk according to the maturities of bonds
3. Call risk: Possibility of the application of call option when interest rates fall
4. Prepayment and reinvestment risk: When interest rates fall, prepayments increase which have to be reinvested at lower interest rates
5. Credit risk: Creditworthiness of the issuer
6. Liquidity risk: Whether sale is possible at fair price or not
7. Exchange rate risk: For overseas investors, the exchange rate is a factor
8. Inflation risk: When inflation is high, the returns in real terms might be lower
9. Volatility risk: For fixed-income securities with call/prepayment/put options
10. Event risk: Risk outside the risks of financial markets
11. Sovereign risk: Risk of governmental policies and attitudes towards repayment of debt

If this much is required to be thought of when considering the relatively low return and low risk government securities, it was the responsibility of the investment banks to be cautious about giving recommendations regarding such high-risk securities. Possibly, if there is sufficient regulation, these practices might give way to genuine research before recommending securities.

And last but not the least: Financial innovation. As I said earlier, financial innovation can be a boon by providing investors having different risk-taking aptitudes with different options. However, the effects of financial innovation can be extreme as we saw and hence, there should be a consideration of all scenarios that might result from a financial innovation before going forward with it. For that, possibly each financial institution might have a separate committee which does a scenario analysis and takes into account all complexities and assumptions before going forward with it (I don't know whether such committees exist but it is quite logical to have one). This is necessary because regulators might not have all the necessary information. It is necessary for the financial institutions to regulate themselves in the interest of the overall market and economy as well as in their own interests..

So that was all that comes to my mind about the sub-prime crisis.. It is late night and this is all that I can think of as of now... If there is something else that comes to my mind, I would edit this post.. Ciao..

Children of Heaven: Soul-stirring

"Baby know all manner of wise words, 

Though few on earth can understand their meaning."

"I wish I could take a quiet corner in the heart of my baby's own world."

These two lines from two discrete Rabindranath Tagore poems (though they were written on babies, yet I am extending their understanding to children in general) aptly imply why he has written them, once you see the movie "Children of Heaven".

"Children of Heaven" is a 1997 Persian film. A parable of pronounced moral nature, it is a tale worth watching by anyone and everyone living on this earth, specially in these times when "selflessness" is an apparition of the allegories.

It is a story of two siblings, a brother and a sister, from a poor family, where the father works hard to feed the three children (the third one was just born) and the mother has problems in her spinal cord and could not do even the household chores for fear of making it worse, do most of the household work as well as go to school and study. The allegory starts with the loss of the girl's shoes. While purchasing some grocery, the boy, Ali kept the shoes that he had brought to the market to be fixed up, near the shop. Unfortunately, the garbage collector, thinking the polythene to be garbage, takes them away. Hence begins a story that revolves around those lost shoes, portraying all the virtues that we as children might have had, but have now probably forgotten. 

Because they knew that their father would not have the money to purchase another pair of shoes, they worked out a mechanism by which both of them could wear the same shoes to school, even though it required both of them to run all the way (the girl from the school to home and the boy from the home to school). At times, Ali was late, and gave various excuses to the principal, who would not see the boy coming late to school, but never once did he tell the principal the story of the lost sneakers, not telling him that it was because he was poor and his family could not afford the shoes that he has to come in late everyday, after his sister came home and returned the shoes. (Though MBAs here would make a case of operational inefficiency: The boy could have come to the school when his sister's classes ended. But then MBAs are MBAs.)

The cherubic innocence with which the boy gives various gifts to his sister, including a golden fountain pen that he got from his teacher on getting good grades, to prevent her from telling his father is a joy to watch. The viewer is left spellbounded by the unworldliness of the boy when he asks his father to buy shoes for his sister when his father found an alternative source of earning money, despite his father promising him different things. 

Not only the innocence of the boy but the maturity with which both children deal with the situation is hard to see in an adult. When the girl finds out that her shoes were with another girl in a lower grade, she takes Ali to the girl's house. But on finding that the girl's father was blind, both children quietly go away without bothering for the shoes. And when Ali cries in front of the teacher to get a chance to win sneakers as a third prize for a race (which was announced when he had not reached school in time), it takes your heart away. 

I would not like to spoil the plot by telling the entire story, but the way the story has been handled is majestic. Excellent performances, good direction and a fantabulous plot ensure that the viewer is glued to the story till the end. The story makes you believe that children are really from heaven. Probably, I could tell my Ethics teacher now that if not telling the truth is not ethical according to Kant, then let him watch this movie and then write his theory.

Watch this movie and relive your childhood. Probably the crowning glory would have been an Oscar in the foreign language category in 1998 for which it was one of the films nominated, but I am sure it would have been a very close second. 

Let me end by speaking a few words about childhood.

"Lord, if ye gave me place in your Kingdom,

Let me be a child forever, I plead.

The Lord replies: Ah, ye not need say that,

Only children reside in the Kingdom of Heaven."

The Forgotten Lamp

I am the forgotten lamp;

I am the damp lamp.

I burn; People are happy,

I bring light to their lives;

While I burn, people enjoy

Praise the beauty of my burning.

And when the fire in me dies,

They forget me, abandon me,

I wonder how people soon forget,

I brought light to their lives.

Konnect 2008: Konnecting the hostels of IIMK

Sorry folks.. I wrote this someday and stashed it away thinking that I will post it sometime.. And then I forgot.. Now that I have found it, let me post it.. Here it goes..

It is said that a match is interesting only when equals compete with each other. And so it was, equals competing with each other, some with vigor poured down on them by the seniors, some rare self-motivated souls, but all competing to preserve the name of their hostels. Lots of games were played, lots of skills came out and lots of shy people came out of the closet. After all, that is the impact that a group has on you. The things you would not do alone, you would easily do it if propelled by a group. Maybe that is why governments discourage mobocracy. However, this was a day when mobocracy was encouraged in the Indian Institute of Management, Kozhikode. The event Konnect was spread over a period of 3 days, with different events on all days. 

One of the most spectacular sub-events of Konnect was a tug-of-war contest, where 25 people from each hostel were supposed to pull 25 equally well-built people from another hostel into their half. The event brought out the passions of all the participating teams, with people from each hostel showing their enthusiasm by shouting, encouraging teammates (even while pulling), strategizing during the breaks, and bursting into whelps of joy after winning. Even the losing teams were equally well-spirited; after each round, there would be an informal sledging competition between both the teams, each shouting slogans proclaiming their hostels to be the best.

Contrast a team event like the tug-of-war with an event like Just-A-Minute (JAM) where individual skills led a person to victory. How much an individual can understand and adapt to a situation determined the results. It is obvious that in a game like JAM, it is more beneficial to catch the errors of others rather than trying to speak more. Some people were able to adapt, some were not. And those who were able to adapt won. However, the passion here was visible in the behaviour of the person. Here, a person would not shout at himself for motivation. Rather the motivation comes from inside. And the strategy too. And of course, here you do not have anybody else to blame if you lose. But then, you do not have anybody else to rely on too if you are not playing well. Also, individual victories are not recognized as much as team victories because it is tougher to synchronize a team.

The different skill-sets of the different genders also came out. And some were in stark opposition to the established beliefs. Hence we saw girls beating boys in some physical tasks, while the top three teams in Antakshari, considered to be a feminine favorite, were all boys. Some games like "Who eats fastest?" involved a lot of strategy. While some games like LAN gaming required gaming skills and comfort with the laptop. Some hostels were extremely ecstatic about each game, while some hostels like the K hostel, where no seniors were present, saw an extreme lack of participation, probably because of lack of seniors there, and corresponding lack of enthusiasm.

“Winners don't quit and quitters don't win.” Moral of the story. Period.

(Yours truly also won 50 points for his hostel K.. Ensured that hostel K didn't end up last.. Since these were the only points hostel K won :-(  )

The Voice of Enigma

Esoteric.. Spiritual.. Arcane.. Recondite.. Words that come to your mind when you seem to be floating in the outer space, exploring what everyone on earth is impotent to reconnoiter, while listening to the music: The Music of Enigma...

I do not know the origins of Enigma or the people who formed the band or regarding their association with any cult or religion. I write this article based on the fact that the songs of Enigma are nonpareil in the field of music. In this world where everything that comes through to us these days is some mix of the same instruments, producing the same type of music, where you can't even understand the spirit of the music. I may not be even a novice in music, but then music is universal, ubiquitous, catholic. Everything that exists is music. Hence because some people (and those people have produced some creative music) have lived a glamorous life, a life that others want to emulate, so anyone today with a even a little sense of how to work on the instruments comes forward and produces songs which, after hearing them, you don't even understand why the people who created them did so. Of course, I understand that the hit rate in any creative activity is extremely low and requires a great deal of work on the subject. (The terms amateur and novice would have been created for some purpose.) But it seems that the aim of these people is not music but its aftereffects. Unfortunately, the test of a successful musician (or any creative art for that matter) is not how many people remember you while you are living in this mortal habiliment but how many remember you after you come out of it. 

Simply listening to Enigma is so energizing.. Whether it is "The Return To Innocence" or "Silence Must Be Heard", almost everything that they have produced is worth listening to. You see songs having a spirit of their own, exhorting you to go into worlds within you, where life prances in front of you, and you realize there is much more to life than just the daily wont. The music refreshes you as much as it enthralls with its quality and more amusing, its mysteriousness. No doubt they chose Enigma as their band name.

Indeed the ictus is on music; with voice being used sparingly, unless it is to produce even more music. And even where words have been used, they have been used in such a way that the music and the words consummate the purpose immaculately.

My personal favourite would be "Out from the deep". Some 20 words make this song, but you would not listen to a song that is extreme with profundity.. "And that's why we're here".. Of course, it is more the words that cut your soul and affect you philosophically and spiritually.. It makes you feel as if you are watching a macro-view of your life.. And comparing it with the song and the underlying theme: the purpose. Let me end by reproducing some words from the song. 

We came out from the deep

To learn to love, learn how to live;

We came out from the deep

To avoid the mistakes we made;

That's why we are here.

We came out from the deep

To help and understand, but not to kill;

It takes many lives till we succeed

To clear the debts of many hundred years

That's why we are here.

So true; yet the absolute opposite of what most of us do in practice. Of course, the growing tribe of agnostics and non-believers would not agree to some words, but most would agree that the music is delphic. And even if it forces us to think about ourselves once a day, it serves the purpose of creating an oeuvre of such songs. Kudos to Enigma!

Kiss Me... By P B Shelley

Folks, this one is one of my favourite poems... Short, simple and sweet

The fountains mingle with the river, 

And the rivers with the ocean;

The winds of heaven mix forever

With a sweet emotion;

Nothing in the world is single;

All things by a law divine

In another's being mingle-

Why not I with thine?

See, the mountains kiss high heaven,

And the waves clasp one another;

No sister flower could be forgiven

If it disdained its brother;

And the sunlight clasps the earth,

And the moonbeams kiss the sea;-

What are all these kissings worth,

If thou kiss not me?

Such a sad story that he died at such a young age... 

Vanity

It is not just a show of knowledge,

It is not the lie behind their true speech,

It is not only the false profession of love, 

It is not for the lack of show of humanity,

It is not the lack of belief in God;

Making them believe that your each word is true,

The entire sciences which already existed,

Though suppressed by nature for you to find;

And basking in that profaneness and vanity,

Hiding behind the beautiful human face,

The ugly behemoth of an egoistic nature,

Not knowing really in their knowledge,

Had it not been for His own will,

You could have never even risen from the dust;

He makes you believe the zenith to be the end,

As also the death to be a beginning;

Maybe most don't agree with me,

Since it's His will for them to do so,

Yet as they say, ignorance is a bliss,

Though themselves they don't believe,

But yet, yes I do, and I believe,

He Himself will one day lead us,

All into that eternal joy and knowledge,

And then we won't die but vanity will.

Sorry folks... Something serious this time... Will post something light next...

IIMK Lingo

Sorry Harshad... I had this idea but I guess great minds think alike... And you created it first... So I am not going to plagiarize, I give reference: Arbit globe if you can find it on this page... I will create my own list of lingo used in IIMK

A+: A grade given to somebody committed only to spoiling class averages and nothing else..

ABC: 1. Anoop Balachandran.

2. An obsolete term earlier intended to describe top management institutes in India in the past but has no meaning these days..

Assignment: ASS-kickInG-oiNtMENT... Used by Professors for making sick people study and get rid of their diseases... But never successful..

Appy: Apple Macbook... The hottest thing on Kampus... (See: C-hostels)

Arbit: Term for things unreasonable... Generally used for DCP (See: CP, DCP)

Alumni Committee: A committee meant to track where all the hotties from the senior batches have gone away..

Backwaters: 1. A committee of people inclined towards inviting hot chicks to Chettaland (See: Chetta)... Unfortunately because none such exist here

2. IIMK's cult-cum-management fest, which we eagerly wait for, to see those hot chicks..

3. A term people refer to without even knowing what it is when they visit beaches..

Beautiful Girl (See: Girl): A theoretical term with no practical applications existing in IIMK

C-hostel: A hostel of extreme interest to all the other hostels.. Some people alien to this land live here.. These people will know the whereabouts of anybody from A hostel to K hostel but if you ask the whereabouts of somebody from C hostel, they would never know.. These people consider themselves made up of some super-hot stuff... A view exclusive to them..

CC: Computer Center. Used for last-minute print-outs (and Murphy's law applies well here.. At the last moment, if you require it urgently, it never works).. Also used by people who have not got their laptops courtesy Madcom (See: Madcom) 

Chetta: 1. A derivative of "brother" in Mallu

2. A group of species who target some of their own population for certain needs of Maslow's hierarchy.. Fearsome creatures for those who do not belong to the same species but are similar in physical form..

CP: (Originated from Harvard would be my guess.. Abbreviation for Class Participation) No such thing exists... 

Convocation: A day when people who are not willing to go away from IIMK are made to leave and people who desperately do not want the travails for one more year are made to stay (though the species is quite rare)..

Day Zero: A day to prove that the toppers aren't the best in business...

DCP: 1. Desperate Class Participation - Usually people confuse CP with this but this is the original term.. 

2. Desperate for Class Participation - People who remain awake in class and commit blasphemy after blasphemy of waking up asleep people... Trying to get some extra marks by replying to Prof's questions, they lose even more marks than they would have got had they stayed quiet 

EditBoard: A committee supposed to publish magazines on behalf of the college... It does, by encouraging other people to write down articles for them... Instead it takes out a gossip magazine called Tadka.. And the only thing that they do is collect gossip in college...

F: A grade given to people who exceed the professor's limits for DCPs (See: DCP)

Forex: (Foreign Exchange) Don't think finance on Kolya Manus' planet... This word represents some hallowed students coming to this hallowed place from some other corner of the world.. Providing some Chettas the inspiration to dump the philosophy of Chettahood.. The only problem is that some foreign Chettas come along, making the Desi Chettas stick to their Chettahood...

Gas: A term given to the content that one speaks when he doesn't even understand what he is speaking, or the course of some subject no one understands but everyone gets an A, or sometimes used for arbit stuff.

Ghonchu: 1. Quiz master of Zamorin

2. Another quiz master. I can't say anything more than this.

Girl: A species which we long to see here.. Though some are seen here and there chased by scores of people who do not believe in Chettahood... A product of intense competition.. We learn marketing only by trying to woo them and failing...

GOC: God's Own Campus. Visit http://verdance.blogspot.com if you don't believe me.

GOK: 1. God's Own Kapur. A Kapur descendant ecstatic on getting admission from IIM-K thought he had reached God... To realize within two days that he is closer to hell...

2. God's Own Kampus. Preferred term for GOC.

Group: A collection of people, meant to perform certain tasks together, where everyone believes that somebody else from the group will perform it, and eventually, the task gets completed only because they collectively freak out at the eleventh hour

Horizons: A management fest intended to show off the best brains of the country to people in power viz. the corporate world

IIC: (Industry Interaction Cell) A committee originally meant to invite investment bankers and fund managers to IIM-K and interact with them (and of course organize Horizons)... These days it does all these things... Just that the corporate honchos who come don't get a chance to speak because of the presence of a particular creature who simply can't stop speaking.. 

 

IIM-ABC: 1. Institutes from the stone age in the era of information age

2. A new IIM Anoop Balachandran is planning to open after he gets out of here (if he gets out)

IIMK Survey Agency: An entrepreneurial venture by two students of IIMK inclined towards social service whom the SSG (refer to SSG) has rejected (and in whom the professors have no hope) - it is a survey agency with a social cause: that of keeping people awake in lectures through innovative surveys

IIM-K: Indian Institute of Management, Kozhikode. The best institute with the best brains of the country. The fastest growing institute of the country.

IIM-L: An IIM created prior to liberalization only for nerds (unliberalized people).. Originally called IIM-Hell (especially with the Mallu accent), the brand name has been changed since IIMK began operations (for obvious reasons)

IP Messenger: An internal IIMK messenger needed for spamming for past year's papers in exam days.. The message goes to each and every laptop, concerned with the problem or not. Also used to share data-movies, songs, nice ads, etc. A lot more happens on IP which can't be said here...

ITComm: IT Committee.. A group of privileged people who can download anything they like.. They are responsible for maintaining Zamorin (See: Zamorin), bringing movies to kampus and a host of other things... Responsible for everybody's survival for two years..

MADCOM: A committee of mad people who, despite studying microeconomics, believe everything can be obtained without giving any profit to the seller... And call themselves merchandising and design committee... Of course, we love them more than any committee on campus.. They are responsible for my 55K appy (Apple MacBook) and loads of other wonderful stuff at cheaper rates... Specially useful for paying our fees through bank loans.. Though always later than expected..

MCS: Multi-Committee Syndrome - A term used to describe the situation of a particular creature who volunteers for many committees and gets voted nowhere.. 

Media Cell: A committee meant to propagate everything good existing in GOK to the outside world... Instead they don't do any work except escorting C-hostel girls till they sleep.. And writing arbit globe while they are not doing that.. :) 

Mess: Isn't the term obvious?

MessCom: Mess Committee - A committee committed to making the messy mess even more messy... However, they are responsible for keeping us alive by helping us with good, hygienic food...

MF: 1. Margin Free - The only shop to buy toilet soap in Kampus. 

2. Mutual Fund - At the time of placements, seniors ask the juniors to use this definition and speak a lot of gas to get through to companies..

NC: Night Canteen. Generally used in day only. A place where the proprietors, despite having a monopoly over the market, keep prices of food items down in the benefit of the students.. Also a place where all birthday celebrations take place, so that people don't have to go too far to search for milk, coke, pepsi, tea, coffee, etc. to throw over the birthday boy/gal. 

Night-out: Needed to stretch some silly task that should be completed in an hour over the whole night.. NC is a specific cause of this phenomenon.. Generally used in exams..

NIT-C: National Institute of Technology, Calicut. It was created as a sports club for IIMK but because of the lethargy of some senior batches, it was not getting used.. Eventually the government made it an engineering college..

Open-book: A type of exam in which copying from the book is allowed (in case you know the book and bring it to examination hall).. But you can never figure out from which chapter (sometimes subject) the question has been taken...

PGP: People Going through lots of Parties.. You thought something else??

FPM: Frequently Partying Maniacally... These kids have no other work except partying and watching movies from Zamorin for four years... And getting some money for that... What a life!

 

PlaceCom: Placement Committee. People voluntarily get screwed to get elected into this committee and work their asses off during placements.. Kudos to them.. Of course, they have all the access to the insider information.. Other people are terrorized by this committee.. To quote something somebody said: The lesser said, the better. I want a good summers ;)

Quiz: A 10 minute thing supposed to be for 25 minutes where you go and write down your name on the answer sheet out of respect for the professors...

Sangram: Sports meet with IIMB. Here out of mercy for the oldies, we allow them to win by fraud.. However, we never lose on sledging..

Soapbox: A fun-filled event at the time of elections for various committees. Where people wanting to get into committees fail at trying to perform stunts to impress the public.. And eventually only Machiavellian wins...

SSG: Social Services Group. A group made for people with anti-social thoughts who try to get other anti-social people to do service for the society. Because that in itself requires a lot of social service.

STI: Social Transformation in India. A course where you learn how to socially transform India by watching foreign movies which are explicit in nature.. Where the professor teaches everything except the course and still is the most loved professor at Kampus.. The only course where you can freely discuss everything in class (including sex and pornography).

StudCon: Students' Council. Supposed to represent the students, these people are selected to tell other students not to come late to class without following on their own. They give feedback to the administration on behalf of students without knowing the students' feedback.. They help everybody.. If your hostel wash room has not been cleaned for long, call them... err.. They will not clean.. They will ask the responsible person to clean it...

Summers: A phenomenon where students come to know the fraud that is being taught to them over an year.. And eventually come back even more confused than the juniors regarding which specialization is the best...

Zamorin: Hub for movie, songs, files-data collection and an extremely famous (in IIMK) quiz by Ghonchu.. One of the best time-pass kit for IIMK students.

To be updated soon...

One Week Description of IIM-K

Tarantula's message: Kolya, after my repeated requests and that of his friends, has agreed to detail a description of one week at IIM-K. Let us start it right now: Saturday 00:00 am. (Pic: Sleeping in class :D   )

Saturday 0000 hrs

I am sitting on the computer, basically waiting for my Investment Bank of Kozhikode (IBOK :) ) teammates to complete their reports and send them over to me to collate. In the meantime, I am playing quiz on Zamorin (our multi-utility software) and listening to music, while also re-arranging my disarrayed room...

By the way, getting inspired from some events that have happened in my life, I have decided to reorganize my life this week. And that is why I am putting all this down here. Let us see how it works out.

Saturday 0305 hrs

Yes, that is what I thought... That I 'd sleep at 0200 hours maximum... But unfortunately when you are working as a team where nobody wants to work, you invariably get delayed... Hope to get up early tomorrow to go to gym... Still the IBOK work is not completed... Tomorrow 4 major tasks-marketing case study (to be discussed day after), study for test, prepare for Konsult presentation on Financial Consulting (a voluntary task which I took up) and summers preparation interview with seniors at night... Hope all this passes off well... Good night folks...

Sunday 1115 hrs

Whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... Late as usual...

This was my reaction when I saw it was 0840 hours when I got up. Unfortunately these days, I can't hear the alarm, despite setting it more than 10 times. Maybe it is because of accumulation of sleep that one has to face when one enters an IIM. Whatever... My plan was to get up at 0730, do with the morning chores by 0750, go to gym till 0910, get finished with the breakfast by 1000, and bath by 1015, and then work on my IBOK report. Whoa... Such planning!!

But here I am at 1115, with the bath still left, and the IBOK report untouched. Going one hour late... Let's see how the day turns out... Hoping to finish IBOK by 1330 now.

Sunday 1445 hrs

"Winners are not those who follow deadlines; winners are those whom deadlines follow."

And for once, I finished a task way ahead of the deadline I set for myself. I finished with the IBOK task at 1240 hrs and had a nice bath. Listened to some songs from "Bachna Ae Haseeno". Just downloaded.. Our IP messenger always keeps spewing more movies, songs, pics.... The list goes on... 

Anyways, coming back to the point, I started studying for marketing. But it was boring as usual, so I went in for lunch at 1400 hrs. Have just returned. Now I hope to finish off this marketing case by 1700 hrs. Hoping to be a winner this time too... Rock on... :)

Monday 0405 hrs

The vicissitudes of life in an IIM... When you think you are going absolutely right, a sudden boulder disrupts your life and makes your locus of control external. 

Sorry laymen for using such harsh language... After suffering a lot of hardships, the poet's only weapon begins to write its phantasmagoric saga... 

Last time I wrote in the afternoon, it was such a peaceful afternoon. I was reading the marketing chapter to which the case to be presented tomorrow is related. The cool room, the rocking of songs in the background, ideal situation for sleep... But after sleeping for about 20 minutes, I got up and began reading again... Till 0430 I read... And then, all my deadlines were about to change...

Suddenly my IBOK mentor arose from hibernation... A ping on gtalk and I was off to his room, thinking how to finish off the work he will be giving me in one hour...

And here I am, writing this post, having spent 11 hours and 30 minutes (not entirely of course... We sometimes go for food also... Especially on days when we have had a good exercise), I am present before you... My life is in a disarray... And will be for two days considering the amount of work I am supposed to do in the following two days... Finish off the remaining marketing case study and the corresponding chapter (my groupmates have done it... But for CP (or DCP - Desperate Class Participation), I will need to do it)... Tomorrow I am also giving a presentation on Financial Consulting as a volunteer of Konsult, our consulting interest group (We have lots of groups here indeed...)... That will easily take up 2-3 hours of preparation... And QM test on tuesday with not a single word still read....

So let us try to put my schedule for tomorrow and day after in perspective... Tomorrow I hope to get up at 0700 (which of course I can not unless some beauty queen wakes me up), go to gym, have a good breakfast and go to class... 3 classes till 1330 (including the marketing case study, which I will prepare in the class only now)... Then a break from 1330 to 1515 when I will do the assignment of QM to be submitted tomorrow itself... Then QM classes from 1515 to 1800... Then preparation for Financial consulting... And dinner... Night 2115 will have the presentation... Will try to attend the session on "How to write a white paper" from 2215... And then at night will study QM... And tuesday till I write the test in the afternoon at 1430 hrs, I will be studying QM...

Unless the vicissitudes of life in an IIM disrupt my life again...

Monday 1430 hrs

For some reason, the day has passed off well till now... Got off at 0900 hrs despite my premise that I'd wake up if a beautiful young girl asks me to wake up... Well, she did, but then sleep is at a premium here... And when I am in sleep, I don't realize anything... Last week, my hand whacked the mobile in sleep and it went flying to the door, only for me to wake up and realize that my cell was not on the bed... Anyways, I reached the class somewhat late (0920 hrs, though that is not allowed here, I could easily have been thrown out of the class, but probably, Sir was in a better mood)... Passed off the day peacefully.. Studied the marketing case study in the second class (though that does not mean I didn't pay attention to what Sir was saying)... Though didn't do CP (or rather DCP... Desperate Class Participation) in Marketing class, yet having read through the case was sufficient to get a good understanding, and Sir was explaining well today...

Completed QM assignment after class (don't ask how)... And now am going to a 20 minutes sleep before the QM class starts... In the evening, I have a presentation, then a session on how to make a white paper, and tomorrow, the big one... A QM Quiz...

Hoping for the best...

Tuesday 0145 hrs

Ha... And i slept after that for one hour, missing the first QM class (thanks to GOD there was no attendance today)... And once I reached there, got the bad news that I had scored only 6.5 marks out of 30 in a test taken way back (I had expected 15 :(   )... Anyways, that would increase to 9.5 since there was a mistake, but this is too poor... (One bad day takes all your honours away)..... Anyways, I have had a lot of bad days in exams and I hope the results don't come out at all... After the class got over at 1800 hrs, I went to NC where I had a huge glass of Bournvita milk (Tan ki shakti, man ki shakti)... 

And went to my room at 1830... Started preparing for the presentation, but remembered suddenly that Bachna Ae Haseeno has been shared on Zamorin... Had a toss on whether to go through it or not (We scan through Hindi movies.. They are too slow compared to our lives)... 

Scanned through it in half an hour (Yaar, why am I not born a Kapoor!!! Kissing three hot chicks in one movie is too much :(  He has gone further than a Hashmi).... Then suddenly remembered that I had a presentation to make..Started studying again, one hour left, then half an hour left, I knew what I had to present but did not remember it... Went for dinner, took a print-out of the things I had to say in the presentation, gave the presentation (and thankfully, it was good)... Then waited for another session on "How to make a white paper"

2300 hrs, I was free... Now we have a test of QM tomorrow... Open book, so even more conceptual, it will require serious studying... And I have my birthday coming up at 0000 hrs... :)

So went to my room, changed into the dirtiest and smallest clothes I could manage (They were all going to get even more dirty in my birthday celebrations)... Tried studying QM but of no use... Eventually reached NC at 0000 hrs, where the public was ready to kick me (Thankfully the crowd was not as huge as was expected, was this because of the test??)... And then got kicked and was poured on with milk, water, coke, and I do not know what else... 

0030 hrs Came back, had a bath, and then again while I was leaving, my hostelmates caught me and I was again beaten up... Still managed to reach some friends, and we had a nice icecream celebration (I can't eat cake here, no eggless cakes available for vegetarians :( So an icecream party)... Then did some bakar with them, and came back...

Now I am debating whether to start studying QM or sleep... Of course no chance of sleeping now... For the entire night in fact...

Cheers... Happy birthday to me... Or rather, a birthnight in celebration, not my birthday; but of  QM

Wednesday 0320 hrs

Sorry folks... Couldn't write anything before this... Was busy the entire day...

Ok, what happened after I went away last night was that till 0400 hrs, I was doing a lot of time-pass on the internet and IP and Zamorin (Well we have all the means for that, don't we?)... At 0400 hrs, I had a chat with a friend here, to whom I expressed an inclination to study... I asked him to explain some stuff to me... He asked me to go over to his room... I went there, and tried to understand the gibber he threw at me for one hour, then having lost the battle, went to the NC to eat maggi (ha ha... 0515 in the morning), and while it was being prepared, I tried to study.. And guess what... I was understanding stuff... Then ate maggi, went back to my room, and still tried to study but then fell asleep at 0600 hrs (in the morning, u'd say)..

Ok.. let's start from the morning when I again got up late (@0900 hrs) and rushed to class... The MIS presentations were going on and I got a good opportunity to study QM, but sleep is a luxury and MIS is a luxurious session... After that, I don't know when I got up... Probably got up directly when OB sir came in for the third session (No idea that the Microeconomics madam came, taught and went away... She came, she saw, but didn't conquer :) ).... Again fell asleep till sir announced that this was his last class and wished us best of luck for the course (Yeah, our course got finished one month before the exams are due to start...)

After that, (1330 hrs) I decided to skip lunch to come over to study at my room, but unfortunately, got caught up with a former student of mine (a beautiful gal by the way :) )... and some more people... Then realized that I had a test, and with 20 minutes to go, started preparing for the test...

Of course, the test was a big debacle... Which left me quite depressed... Had food in the NC... And some guys from AC Nielsen had come for a survey on our perception of various companies... Got caught up in there for half an hour... 

Eventually, the Managerial Communications session started off at 1645 hrs... And I dozed off again.. (Wondering how much I can sleep!!).. I don't want to repeat the story... Cut to 2100 hrs, when we were finished with all 6 sessions scheduled for the day...

Wow... what a way to celebrate a birthday... 10 hours in class... 6 sessions and 1 test... And when you come out, a marketing case study stares you in the face.. And that is what occupied me till this time... though I went to the NC in the middle for some tomato soup... And did some chatting with some of my friends from college and school... 

Well, now I hope I get up at 7 in the morning to go to gym... Tomorrow is supposed to be a chill day... Not much work except the marketing case study... But who knows?? Remember? The vicissitudes... :)

Wednesday 2215 hrs

Today was my sleeping day... Of course, the plan was to get up for the gym at 0700.. But who knew that I would not be waking up till 1040 despite having a sleep broken by the phone (twice and that too at 0830 when I was supposed to wake up)... The alarm (10 times every day it tries to break my sleep... Unfortunately it is never successful; exceptions notwithstanding)... One classmate, my neighbour Nitin who wakes me up every day in the hope that I would wake up... Only to find me sleeping half an hour later... 

Anyways, I was bamboozled when I saw it was 1040... which meant not only had I missed the accounting class but was late for communications class as well... And just when I was about to lock my room, Nitin came from behind and said, why are you running? I said I have already missed the accounts class and am going to miss the MC class too... He said, "Relax, the accounting class was cancelled." Instances like this make me believe in fate (and GOD... but let's keep Him out of this discussion)... Then we went to the MC class, where after so many days, I really saw the two presentations without sleeping... And for the first time, I enjoyed the marketing class today... Not only was I prepared today but our Sir was in a much better mood than usual... 

After that, we had our lunch in the afternoon, and then, after some 5 days, I saw the face of the TT room... :) Played TT for two hours (now who says IIM guys only study??).. And in fact, I was asked to come for cricket in the evening also, but because of tiredness after playing TT, I went to my room, checked mails and all, and slept...

And slept till at 1820 hrs, my neighbour in class, Sanket called me up... I got up in a situation similar to that in the morning (We had an MC class - the second one today - at 1815 hrs).... And I rushed to the class... Once again listened to both the sessions today... And for the first time in so many days, I did a DCP (desperate class participation)... Feels so good... :)

Then I had my food, and now I am thinking of studying something (was listening to songs since dinner)... But as usual, mann nahi ho raha... Let's see... If I have a good movie, I will watch it now I guess...

Thursday 1919 hrs

Last night, when I left you, I watched half a movie... Then went to an E-cell meet at 0000 hrs (mostly in IIMK, that means 23:59:59 but people like me don't follow :D Seniors will kill me if they read this... They brainwashed most of us into believing this in the first week)... But the meet was over by the time I reached (that's what I heard later... never heard of such a small meet)... Anyways, then I went to the NC... A guy's birthday was being celebrated... And I joined in... No I didn't kick too much... I was simply lifting him up for other people to kick... :) ... After sometime, another guy (he looks like a gorilla in the body of Amjad Khan....) who is the foremost in D section in beating people up (of course, no one can retaliate against him alone), all got together and gave him his stuff back (I don't think it must have made much of a difference to him, he got a lot of sponge on his backside... :D)... And one guy from our class (who is always seen with the girls of D class only) was picked up (probably because of the frustration D section guys are facing because of him) and beaten... And we joined in here too :)... Behti Ganga me hum aur hamare class ke padosi jinhe hum Adi Manus bolte hain, hath dho hi lete hain... And one of that guy's 'girls' came and poured some Coke over his head... This made him absolutely pissed off... He went running after her with a cup of tea in his hands.... We got into the active observer's act and told him that you couldn't pour hot tea over her head... I offered him my cold Bournvita... We didn't believe he could actually spill it over her but eventually he did as the girl almost ran away... Now that's a sight you don't often see in IIM-K: a girl showered with Bournvita :) :) :)

I ran away after that... And there are rumours that the girl is still searching for me for offering that guy the Bournvita... Of course, after seeing her kick him so much, I am not falling into her hands :D ... 

Anyways, after that, we went off to A hostel for gyaan sessions for summers... One of our sincere classmates had prepared some stuff which he shared with the hostelmates... See, learning and fun go together in IIM-K... And then, somebody realized that the birthday boy has not been beaten up in hostel... Poor he... The seniors were called for the session... And it makes every hair on my body stand when I remember the butt-kicking he received.. Once again, I obliged in picking him up (I don't hit people... I facilitate the process...)... And eventually, more people got picked up for different reasons... And yours truly was one of them for having his birthday two days back :(

Then I came back and slept... And today was a roller-coaster ride... Once again I did not get up for gym but I did some exercise today which made me feel good... Today was MIS last session... And some things happened which I cannot describe :) Some internal folklore of IIMK which should remain...

Anyways, we had only two sessions, so after that, we went to see our MIS marks... Then I had some work that always gets left out (buying some notebooks and stuff), which I finally completed today... And then I again came to my room and listened to songs... (No study today).. Then went for MC class... And played carrom for half an hour after that... BTW we received our Microeconomics marks in between... Horrible.... I shouldn't describe such things I guess.. 

Anyways, it has been fun since two days... No real studying... So I guess I will be studying now... Ciao folks...

Saturday 0119 hrs

Ha ha ha.... Studying now... Right... Sometimes, I look back at what things I decide for myself and then turn back on it... If I try to do sampling of this random variable and take out the relative frequency of... Ohh.. Sorry folks. QM getting onto my head...

Anyways, I did a lot of time-wastage after I wrote the last sentence down last time, went to have dinner (which is getting unbearable now... Not because the food is bad, but because eating the same kind of food daily causes inertia for taste... And taste does not like inertia at all... It likes change.. Like life... Am I getting too philosophical now??) and then came back to my room to study for the marketing case study. And fell asleep for an hour. Studies are becoming catalysts for sleep these days. (You might have seen the pic above.)

When I woke up after an hour, I realized I had only 10 minutes before our group meets to solve the case. I messaged them that I would not be coming, but would be solving the question assigned to me in my room itself and send it to them... I was reading the case like in exams... Dozing off and getting up after 5 minutes, reading 2-3 lines and dozing off again.. :)

Ultimately I read the case and realized that solving the question would be extremely easy but would require some data, on which my group was working... Anyways it was 2330 and I had an E-cell volunteers meet at 0000 hrs... So I went to the library, where these people were absolutely raping the data... err.... working furiously on the data... And I joined them.... And having got bored soon... So I went off for the volunteers meet where no one turned up (The bane of a B-school... No one is willing to work unless there is a senior involved... Only a few sincere guys like yours truly get screwed in the process) I went back to the marketing case study, where people were already starting dispersing to work on their questions (Actually we solve the case study like this... Generally, to facilitate the solution of any case study, some questions are given at the end so that the students focus on those aspects of the case.. And we divide each aspect amongst us so that it becomes easier to solve the case... Advantages of team work.. whatsay??)... They were going to upload the data that they had come up with on the common folder on the server (Another nice thing about an IIM... You share a lot of knowledge with peers through various mediums).. So I went with a group-mate Sam to the NC.. Had some food... And then returned to our rooms..

Then the big time-wastage phase started... I had come back to my room at about 0115 hrs... But till 0230 hrs, I was wasting time on our IP messenger (the messenger used for internal messaging between all students of IIMK... A lot of spam is created everyday on that since people generally multicast things for everyone who is online... Pro: We get very nice songs, movies, news, information, etc. from these multicasts.. Cons: If something is not important for you, like some discussion going on, you can get very irritated with windows popping up every now and then... Yesterday it was a bunch of juniors like I who were creating the spam...) 

After 0230, it took me 10 minutes to solve the case, and send it to my groupmate who was collating the questions (Unfortunately I forgot to attach the file :( which I came to know about only in the morning and I quickly rectified my mistake... And that groupmate of mine was awake till 0430 hrs waiting for my file... Poor he... Not a real problem... He slept in class instead of that)...

Finally I slept... And eventually a day came when I woke up early in the morning (if 0720 can be considered early enough) and went to the gym... Life is so good when you exercise in the morning... Had some nice classes.... Not that I did not sleep in any class, but paid some attention and did some DCP :D

In the afternoon, I came to my room and thought of studying... Just lied down on the bed... And woke up after 2 hours... After exercising, sleep does become necessary... Which is why most people do not do hardcore exercising in most B-schools... I am a hardcore exerciser (whenever I do)... Never mind... Didn't have much work to do anyways...

Woke up and studied for an hour... Then went to NC for my evening snack of Paneer Paratha (yummy) and Bournvita... Came back, did some study again, did some exercise, and then went to the grand dinner that was organized today...

IIMK was born today 12 years ago...

We had a gala feast... And I ate a lot... Awesome food today... :D

After that, I went to another group (We generally work in groups here..) for preparing another presentation we are supposed to deliver tomorrow... Attended a session of AbaKus (our systems interest group..).. And then went to play Carrom and TT.... And away went my precious 2 hours...

Then came back to my room and prepared the slide on the presentation we have to deliver tomorrow (My part I did...) Now our group is getting together in the NC to collate the presentation and decide on who will speak what...

However, today's day was quite productive... Exercise, study, sports, great food... I had a blast today... Thank you, My Lord...

Last day of this description today... :D

Saturday 0000 hrs

And I went back to the NC last night to find one of my group partners, who said that we all were meeting in his room. Now his room is very strategically located :) just near the TT and Carrom room... Ohh... Then how can I help preparing the presentation? I and one other groupmate went away to play carrom... While others collated the PPT. And at 0315, I came back to my room and slept..

In the morning, it was my turn to slog it out... You see I had the job of making the PPT worth presenting (actually I worked a lot on making good reports in IBOK, so I told them I'd do it)... Got up at 0830; so, had to give the gym a miss today (really?).. Slogged on the report till 1015... Ahh... I didn't mention what we were presenting in class: Colour-changing urinals :D :D :D

Eventually made to the class right on time at 1045 hrs (Actually I practice the JIT philosophy-just in time... I might be late, but I can never be before time :)... ) Had a nice presentation where both the groups presenting this topic were making fun of each other's presentations :) ... After that, it was pretty much a boring day... Came back to room, did a bit of exercise... Went for food... Got the bank loan today (Thank GOD, now I have been under debt for so many days.. Now that money will need to be debited to my creditors accounts :D... Or is it the other way round?? ) Got OB marks... Don't ask... Then came back to the room with full intent of studying hard the whole day and fell asleep within five minutes... And got up only at the time of the second session of MC... Had two boring presentations... Then went to TT room again (Why do I waste time when I don't have it??)... Played for two hours.. Went to gym... (Where I saw once again Liverpool coming out of the dead to beat Middlesborough... And my preferred team Arsenal playing as badly as never against Fulham... Of course, they went on to lose the match..) Had food in NC where some people of our class were creating havoc with their quawwalis... Then came back to my room to find my neighbour and another classmate sharing their company experiences... I sat down like I had no work.. And then, a call came which forced me out of the room... Then into my room... I saw my ever-on appy (I don't call it lappy... it is much more than that.. Apple rocks... Nazar na lag jaye..) lying alone... couldn't bear it... So started writing this down.. 

We are pretty much finished with the description of my one-week@IIMK. There are some things which I have not mentioned because a layman might not understand it. There are some things which I have not mentioned here because I do not want to. There are some things which I have not mentioned here because some people might not like it. Other than that, this pretty much describes the typical life here... It is not always chill, sometimes there is a lot of work; but even in those times, there is a lot of fun... The spirit of the people is always high here... Except in class of course... 

There are quite a few things which I have learnt even while recording this description... About myself and about the college and the people here... Having never written anything like a diary, I now realize why people do maintain diaries... That does not mean that I will continue this practice because frankly, it takes quite a bit of time... And that is why I sit only once a day to describe what happened... But it is worth doing if you have 20-25 minutes to spare each day...

Unfortunately, we have everything but time at IIM-K...

Having read through the entire description, I feel it is somewhat boring to read daily life sequences (maybe that's why everything we see in movies is so heroic... Even a protagonist combing his hair is heroic :) )... But then, I wanted to describe everyday life here and not the story of a Hogwarts here... So please forgive me for that...

Cheers all... See you folks later with something even more interesting...

The Power Of Now: The Book and Kolya's thoughts

I read "The Power Of Now" last year, while preparing for CAT. It is an amazing book to say the least. If applied to life, it can solve most of our problems, if not all. Just a few pages into the book, I read something which I have known for quite a bit of time - that the problem of the mind - the chief source of all problems - is that it does not cease to work. It goes on thinking and analyzing and resolving and remembering, causing unnecessary wastage of mental energy. Paradoxical but true. If nothing else, a song continuously goes on in the mind, creating unnecessary noise and confusion, especially while doing some work which requires concentration. Which means that to concentrate or rather, to think properly, we need to stop thinking! Amazing are the ways of life.

Thinking more about this matter, I feel that the difference between those who concentrate better and those who can't must be the noise in the mind. Which means people who can't concentrate are thinking much more than those who do. The difference is that the former are thinking more in the background rather than in the zone that requires focus while the latter try to think the maximum in the focus zone. It reminds me of the chapter I learnt (or left unlearned) during my engineering - NOISE. When two people talk on the phone, it is the background sound which determines the actual noise. If there is more background noise, the concentration of the listener is disturbed, leading to confusion. On the contrary, if there is no noise in the background, then the voice is clearly audible and there is no confusion.

Now compare the phone conversation with the thinking process. The talker is the mind making a conscious effort for the solution of some problem. The listener is the entity which requires that concentration - in our case, we take it to be the problem which requires a solution. The noise is the unnecessary thoughts that keep coming to the mind. As the conversation continues (as a problem is being solved), the listener (the problem) gets disturbed [:)] or is not able to hear the talker (the solver or the solution) because of background noise (unnecessary thoughts). So if we can keep these thoughts away from the mind, peace exists. It can really be experienced with some struggle with the sub-conscious mind.

THE NOISE

Control my mind, there is no peace;

The way is inside you, they say,

The babbling creates the chaos,

Peace is where there is no extreme,

Status quo maintained! But how?

When this mind, like an atom bomb,

Keeps emitting nuclear thoughts,

Each moment at work, no rest for it,

And one day like an overspent force,

Loses its focus, and that is when,

Senility sets in, the zeal is lost,

So control it now, the way is here,

If flawless systems you create outside,

Look inside you, a flawless system,

A gift given to you! Don't spoil it.

And when you achieve perfection,

The level of conscious, an extreme,

The concentration and the creativity,

Ah! That is an extreme; I desire.

Adi Manus' corner - Everyday jokes by the PJ King of IIMK

This post is dedicated to one of Kolya's batchmates at IIM-K, let us call him Adi Manus. He has this spectacular ability to consistently produce some stupid jokes, some of which I will reproduce here... Mind you that the name of our hero Adi Manus has been changed... But of course everyone knows him... He is considered the PJ King of the college... He can't bear using his own name on his own jokes since the girls after whom he runs might not like it (though I believe the girls like his jokes too... Well, whatever...) :) ... Let it remain a part of the IIM-K folklore... This is a post which will keep growing for the next two years...

------------------------------------------------

Kolya and his good friend Adi Manus were sitting in a session of Financially Yours, the finance interest group at our college. Various kinds of bonds were explained - corporate, treasury, and what not. The Adi Manus being very interested in Finance, mugged them up immediately. Then our superhero Adi Manus, while on the trail of a villain, met another superhero from IIM-K, James Bond.

Adi Manus: Who are you??

James Bond: The name is Bond...

Adi Manus (without letting him finish): That is fine, but which sort of a bond are you - corporate or treasury??

James Bond faints...

------------------------------------------------

In IIMK, two exams are held on the same day. Our Adi Manus, being already made weak by the rigorous study routine of IIMK, got confused between Managerial Accounting and Social Transformation in India, two subjects which were held on the same day.

He was found mumbling in sleep: "Hilton Hotels has great assets. Their socially transformed granddaughter is always eager to show them."

------------------------------------------------

Once Kolya and Adi Manus were sitting in the CC of IIM-K (ala the Computer Center). One of his female interests called him up to come to the NC (Night Canteen)... (Yeah, he is a superhero... Fights for any and every molecule of any female species present in Chettaland)... Now, one of the norms of the CC is that you do not generally shut down a computer but log it off...

Adi: Kolya, I am very confused...

Kolya: Why?

Adi: Shouldn't we always log off before shutting down the computer?? What if I do not get logged off despite shutting it down??

Kolya realized how to see stars during daytime...

------------------------------------------------

Adi Manus went to one of our C-gulls in IIM-K and proposed to her... (Whoaaaaaaaaa)

Girl: Apni shakal dekhi hai, isse achcha main suicide kar lu...

Adi Manus: Kamini marr jayegi, par ek gareeb ke kaam nahin ayegi...

------------------------------------------------

Adi Manus, in a drunk state, phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car.

Adi: They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator... (Sob)

Before the police investigation started, the police received another call.

Adi: Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake!

------------------------------------------------

Kolya Manus was aghast when he saw Adi Manus (when they were on a trip to Kappad beach) trying to drown a fish in water...

In fact, he has to explain to him everyday that every person is required to put in his signature in the attendance sheet... Adi Manus never gets convinced and enters his sign "Saggitarius"..

------------------------------------------------

Once Kolya asked Adi Manus: "Have you read Shakespeare??"

Adi: "No... Who wrote it??"

------------------------------------------------

Adi Manus, in the middle of a class on a Monday, started laughing... He had finally understood the joke Kolya had told him on Wednesday...

------------------------------------------------

Adi Manus was trying to throw off a bird from the academic hill at IIMK.

Kolya: What are you doing mate??

Adi: I am trying to kill this bird!!!

Kolya: @#$#$@

------------------------------------------------

Kolya once said to Adi Manus: Oh.. Shit!! Look at that dead bird!

Adi (seeing skyward): Where?? Where??

------------------------------------------------

Once Kolya saw that Adi Manus has a specific type of shoes with 'TGIF' written on it...

Kolya: Adi, why is this thing written on your shoes?

Adi: So that I remember while wearing them in the morning that "Toes Go In First"..

Kolya collapses...

------------------------------------------------

Once, before joining IIM-K, Adi Manus proposed to a girl... The girl said,"Yes, but only after you bring me a pair of alligator boots."

Adi Manus set out in search of alligator boots... Searched all alligators in India but could not find their boots...

Kolya suggested to him that he should go to Africa where the probability of finding a booted alligator might be more considering the variety of animals living there...

Adi Manus set out for Africa... And did not return for 2 years...

Eventually Kolya set out to find him... He was found hunting an alligator... He walked over it, checked its legs and angrily blurted out, "953rd alligator and still no boots!!!"

-------------------------------------------------

Seeing that too much academic pressure has caused mental pressure for students at IIM-K, some professors once invited an eminent psychiatrist here. Our Adi Manus refused to being checked by the doctor, saying he never studies, so he is perfectly alright :) ...

However, at the dinner, he happened to sit near the doctor in the mess.. Now, can Adi Manus sit quietly?? Never.

Adi: Can you tell me, Doc, how would you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears absolutely normal? (Adi had got so much frustrated with Kolya, who made fun of him, that he was making plans to show that Kolya is mentally deficient)

Doctor: Oh, that's pretty easy.. You ask him a simple question which no one should have any trouble answering.. If he hesitates, it puts you on the right track.

(Adi begins to think of examples but could find none.)

Adi: Doc, can you give me an example?

Doc: Well you might ask him, "Columbus the navigator made 3 trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one of them did he die?"

Adi thinks for a moment, becomes nervous, then says with a laugh, "Oh give me some other example Doc. I must confess I don't know much about history.

-------------------------------------------------

Adi Manus was a software engineer before coming to IIM-K.. Once he met a construction labourer.. The labourer was making fun of Adi Manus' appearance, so Adi got furious and approached him...

Adi: How dare you insult me like that?

(Waits for reaction... But there is none...)

Adi: Aaj mere paas bangla hai, gadi hai, stock options hai... Aur tumhare paas kya hai??

(English transliteration: Today I have a big bungalow, car, stock options.. What do you have??)

Worker: (Softly) Mere paas... Mere paas kaam hai...

(Eng: I have work...)

-------------------------------------------------

Once Adi Manus was going to the airport.. On the way, he saw a sign, "Airport left"...

Disappointed, he turned around and headed back home :)

-------------------------------------------------

Once Kolya Manus and Adi Manus landed up in Mumbai... There they got into a double-decker bus.. Kolya got a bottom seat, while Adi was pushed to the top by the unruly Mumbai crowd.. After sometime, when most people got off, Kolya went upstairs to see his friend Adi Manus. Adi Manus was in an extremely bad state, clutching the seats in front with both his hands, and was scared to death...

Kolya: Ohh man... WTF... Why are you so scared? I was so enjoying my ride down there...

Adi: But you've got a 'driver'.

--------------------------------------------------

Once Adi Manus asks Kolya: "Who are the group of people jo logon ko maar ke unki dead body pe ghanti bajate the?" (People who killed people and then ringed bells on their dead body)

Kolya thinks and thinks....

Finally he gives up..

Adi Manus: "Oh.. You can't be from IIM-K... The people are called 'mar-ke-ting' people."

Kolya faints...

--------------------------------------------------

Adi Manus: Yaar Kolya, my girlfriend left me...

Kolya: Tu uska khayal nahi rakhta hoga... (You mustn't have cared for her)

Adi Manus: Kya baat kar raha hai yaar!! Sagi behen ki tarah rakhta tha... (What are you saying?? I kept her like my real sister..)

-------------------------------------------------

Once Adi Manus got caught on a copied assignment...

Professor: Adi Manus, your managerial communication assignment on 'My Dog' is the same as that of Kolya Manus..

Adi: Sir, it's not my fault, it's the same dog..

--------------------------------------------------

Once Adi Manus said to Kolya Manus that he wants to lose weight; his tummy having blossomed since coming to IIM-K.

Kolya: Run everyday 5 kms for 60 days... You'd lose your weight...

The next 60 days, Adi Manus was nowhere to be seen... Exams went by, but still he didn't return... Kolya almost forgot him, but then one day Adi called him up.

Kolya: Dude, where the hell have you been? You didn't turn up for exams too..

Adi: You said I should run 5 km everyday...

Kolya: So?

Adi: So I am 300 kms away from IIM-K now... And still running...

Kolya: WT*%$*%$*#@#$

----------------------------------------------------

Managerial communication presentation...

The professor could not understand anything that Adi Manus was presenting...

Prof: I don't understand anything that you say...

Adi: That is because what I am saying is a much more advanced research than you could ever imagine.

The prof got bewildered.

Prof: Ok, I am going to ask you two simple questions, if you answer those, you pass, else I will fail you.

1. Name two days of the week beginning with 'T'.

2. How many seconds are there in an year?

Adi Manus thought long and hard. The professor was still smirking when Adi Manus suddenly started speaking.

Adi: 1. The two days of the week that begin with 'T' are Today and Tomorrow.

2. There are 12 seconds in an year.

The prof got even more bewildered. Finally, having composed himself, he begins speaking.

Prof: Ok, I will still buy Today and Tomorrow, but for heaven's sake did you get 12 seconds in an year.

Adi Manus (smiling): Well, it's simple... January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd....

The Professor resigned from IIM-K with a recommendation to make Adi Manus the managerial communications professor.

-------------------------------------------

Adi Manus was going through the streets of his hometown after the end-terms got over.. He saw a man eating grass by the roadside.. Adi Manus got out of his car and went to speak to the man..

Adi: Why are you eating grass?

Poor Man: I don't have money for food.

Adi: Oh.. Please come to my home..

Poor Man: Sir, I have 2 wives and 5 kids...

Adi (getting jealous): Ok, bring them all along..

Poor Man (in the car): Sir, you are too kind.. Thanks for taking us all in..

Adi: I think you are not getting it.. The grass at my house has grown 4 feet long...

--------------------------------------------

Once Adi Manus got married.. Still, his habit of chasing skirts didn't go away...

So once his wife hit him on the head with a frying pan..

Adi (getting crazy): What was that for?

Wife: That was for a piece of paper with the name Lola written on it that I found in your pant's pocket..

Adi: But that was the horse that I bet on at the race last week..

The wife apologized and went back to work..

One hour later, she hit him again on the head with a bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious..

When he got up, he asked,"Now what was that for??"

Wife: Your horse called...

-------------------------------------------

Adi Manus (to one of the few girls at IIMK): Oye soniyo, juti to badi soni pehni hai.. (Hey beautiful, that is a beautiful shoe you're wearing)

Girl (angry): Utaru kya?? (Should I take it off)

Adi Manus: Oye main kya sonio, "pajama" to aur bhi sona hai.. (Beautiful, I am saying that your pyjama is even more beautiful)

--------------------------------------------

Adi Manus in a Biology practical exam prior to joining IIMK...

Examiner: Tell me the name of the bird by seeing its legs only..

Adi Manus: I don't know.

Examiner: You are failed. What's your name?

Adi Manus: See my legs and tell...

--------------------------------------------

There is a lot of rain in IIMK... Once Adi Manus was carrying an umbrella with a hole in it.. Kolya Manus greets him...

Kolya: Why is there a hole in your umbrella?

Adi: How will I come to know if the rain stops??

Yet again, Kolya faints...

--------------------------------------------

In the hot February of IIMK, Kolya Manus confronts Adi Manus.

Kolya: What do you do when you feel hot?

Adi: I go near the A/C and sit.

Kolya: What do you do if you still feel hot?

Adi: I switch on the A/C

Need I say what happened to Kolya?

---------------------------------------------

Once Adi Manus got caught in a murder case and gets a death sentence.

Police: Kal subah 5 baje tumhe phansi de di jayegi..

Adi Manus started laughing..

Police: Why are you laughing?

Adi: Main to uthta hi 9 baje hu...

----------------------------------------------

More to come soon.... :)

Love Marketing

(Made in marketing class, serious one... :) )

More intense competition here

Than for anything else on earth.

Billions already caught up

More being drawn in its girth.

Love's labour lost, they say,

Likeable people are in dearth.

Biased towards exterior decoration,

Unhealthy competition stays inert.

Busy are people, nay brands,

Incessantly positioning and competing;

Making only their targets important

And leaving even friends contemplating.

Do unto others as you wish to be done

The thought leaves the poet thinking

Who follows these stupid rules,

My Lord, what were you creating?

Difficult to be equal to all,

I agree it is, and with a purpose.

But then; so is life, difficult,

Yet that is something everyone does.

Still ready to slit their throats,

Who cometh their way, O Moses!

Hope they understand someday,

Made in heaven-love-a bed of roses.

Something I wrote in the accounting class... :)

Management of Accounting Class

Some with their brows knitted in concentration,

Some fighting will-power to obstruct impending day-dreams,

Some indirect glancing; illusions of future love,

Some awake and alive, minds wandering on solar gleams;

A purpose for some; an enjoyment for others;

Who try to find what they are here for,

Some, like me, observing the others, who

Trying to prevent the professor from being dour,

He whose only visible features are eyes and hair,

Tries to reply and not pull his locks off;

A tug-of-war ensues, and the professor emerges victorious;

And more go to sleep; while some others scoff.

A pleasant sight of inspiration for the poet,

As one day, none of them will be here,

And sleepers would miss their pleasant sleep,

And the professor will let his locks be sheared.

But the poem will bring back lost accounts,

Memories will be debited, and happiness be credited,

For the poem takes you back in space and time;

And the poet will be praised for the lost world recreated.

Some Quotes from a broken heart (The quotes are mine, the broken heart is not :) )

"Why are some of the best poems the most sorrowful?"
"Because we are sadists, we love seeing pain."

"I hide myself, my poems express me. They are my best friends."

"We are here to love and experience the sorrow associated with it."

"The poet is one who can give words to the happiness and sorrow of others."

The Pain

Why hast Thou given us the heart, O Lord;
And still, why the pain that resides inside.

It knows it can't get everything it wants,
Why hast thou given it the desires then,
Life is fickle, desperation is never rewarded;
The desperate is left with pain in it.
Life anyways has a contract with a bull,
Who takes it away at an inopportune moment,
When the heart wants to live the most.

Why hast Thou given us the heart, O Lord;
And still, why the pain that resides inside.

While alive, we talk about true love;
And try finding the source, providing the heart,
The joy, we believe we are born to experience;
To be with 'The One', and be one with 'The One',
But The One doesn't see love in your heart,
The pain that arises, I just can't express,
My pen doesn't feel the pain that I do.

Why hast Thou given us the heart, O Lord;
And still, why the pain that resides inside.

Blood is stuck inside, my knees are weak;
Eyes provide rains to cool it off,
The soul wants to leave the body;
But sin it is, and a true loving heart,
No sin it doth; And still, it rues,
People say heaven and hell are here,
Heaven can't be; but hell is for sure.

Why hast Thou given us the heart, O Lord;
And still, why the pain that resides inside.

Philosophers I read say true love is;
And the universe helps you achieve it,
I have experienced what this love is,
A beautiful feeling, no doubt, so why-
There exists pain in my heart, and why,
Never is love reciprocated, why does The One
Not understand, I live for your happiness.

Why hast Thou given us the heart, O Lord;
And still, why the pain that resides inside.

I live for your happiness, though sorrow
Penetrates my heart with mighty arrows,
And the heart cries out, I love you so much,
Can't live without you, & can't live with you;
Hope you find true love in someone, though
I am sure he will never experience the love
That existed in my heart when it died.

Why did Thou gave us the heart, O Lord;
And still, why the pain that died inside.


(Please don't miss the last two lines, they are different from the repetitions given above, this is supposed to be something like the lyrics of a song, but I don't know how to make the music... :( )

Horizons...

A steady breeze blows from the horizon,
My ears become cold; clouds kiss them,
A hazy grey fog ensues, drowning all,
Seems like the love God is arriving.

The clouds turn to mist, begin to rain;
A beautiful smile crosses humanity's faces,
Everyone feels His charm from inside,
Trees wave as Mother Nature dances.

And I feel myself a tiny creature,
Love leaking from horizon, filling all,
Its yellowish glaze glittering in the grey.
And my blood capillaries move all over.

Just the feeling arouses such pleasure,
Earth and sky making love on nature bed,
The orgasm excites every molecule on earth,
See the leaves outside bloating in glory.

The last meeting

A love that I found, a love that is so dear,
She is so dear to me, with her everything I share,
And when I go away from her, seeing her tear,
A small sparkle of platinum, I can't see I fear.

And I realized it, how much she was near,
When she left me to go, far away from here,
The last meeting we had, I out of sheer fear,
Clasped her hard as I can; I had my dear one near.

And when the clouds moved and the stars were clear,
She got close to my ear, wiping a tear,
And said something that made my heart sear,
Just say "I love you", for you everything I bear.

Hope always keeps me running like a deer,
But away from her, darkness I see everywhere,
I ask those going to her, the clouds touch her hair,
And tell her, I love her the most, for her only I care.

The One-Night Stand (With Marketing)

We got together at night,
She looked beautiful, like a nymph,
I didn't realize she was a nympho,
Within the first few minutes, she got on top,
And I tried to fight,
The violence was engaging, pleasant,
I was determined to succeed,
The process was slow, engaging,
I was slowly understanding her needs,
Gradually I got her engaged too,
And got on top,
Now I was the king,
But I was not to know,
The process is to-and-fro,
Sometimes she would be on top,
And I wouldn't understand anything,
And sometimes I would be on top,
Enjoying the slow, fulfilling process.

Eventually the morning arrived,
Both of us still together,
Both of us happy, satisfied,
She thought she had consumed me,
Exams would tell a different story,
The fact that I had consumed her.

... The last two lines are written in hope... I am hopeless about marketing...

This poem might be found in a lot of different places... But originally it belongs here...
Famously infamous on IP Messenger of IIMK...

Entering IIM-K

Waiting I was.... Waiting for the train that was to take me to the place where I would spend the next two years (hopefully it wouldn't be more than that... Not because I don't like the place... I would love to spend my entire life here... But I would not want to be in the class of my juniors while my batchmates forge ahead) The train was late because there had been some problem on the Mulund station (The speakers were blaring that there had been some public unrest)

Anyhow, the train turned up finally... 1 hours and 10 minutes late... Which had passed quite nicely since one of my future batchmate's uncle had come over there to meet him and he was also stranded because the train was late... I was continuously reminded how important the IIM tag will be for me in the future (Well, it certainly is at present)... We had some nice chitchat with another family who was waiting for the train too... And the daughter asked me whether she should try for an IIT... Your opinions become so important when you are going into an IIM...

As the train came, I rushed forward to my bogie... More so because I had a lot of stuff with me... (7 bags I guess... I was going for 2 years after all)... And as I reached my seat, I found two of my batchmates, one of whom I had already met in an IIMK party (Yeah, the induction starts much before college :) ) Those poor fellas helped me organize my stuff, since there was no way all our luggage could have been accomodated in that small 3AC compartment.

The next 24 hours I will remember for my entire life... It was quite natural.. There were 13-14 of us (In fact, there were more than 20 but we could not find all of them) and the beautiful ride of Konkan railways... It is amazing... People say that many labourers died while that track was being prepared... I salute each one of them who worked in such hardships to create a thing of beauty...

What happened in the train is a part of internal gossip of IIMK, so I would move over to when we reached our destination-Kozhikode. Beware of Coolies on Kozhikode station.. They would not wait for you. They take it for granted that they have to take away the luggage and it is with your approval.. And you can't convince them otherwise...

Anyhow, we had a big group with lots of luggage.. So it was a daunting task.... However, the coolies managed to take the entire luggage to the bus somehow (The Bus?? Which bus?? Yeah, everything is planned here... The bus from Indian Institute of Management, Kozhikode was waiting for us.. And along had come a senior to guide us regarding the process... Managers?? We have it in our blood) There was so much luggage that half the bus was filled with it...

The ride to IIMK was even more exhilarating (More so because of the driver-in fact, it is really difficult driving in Kozhikode: Not only the roads, but the drivers also are amazingly skillful… Read: In a negative sense) The city is a wonder though...

Entering IIMK: Our seniors had sent us a video about life@IIMK. So it is not that we had not seen the institute. However, as we entered the institute, all of us were struck by the beauty of the institute. I may not be a traveller, but I have been to many places... As well as many IIMs... There cannot be a more beautiful institute than this one. People say it's a resort, a hill station and what not. If I had already seen so many photos and videos and could not have imagined how beautiful the institute can be, then what would have been the condition of those who had not even seen the photos... They were simply awestruck... The place is heaven on earth. Maybe after entering the institute, I came to realize why Kerala is called GOD's own Kountry... And why the institute is called GOD's own Kampus... Ohh... The K-bug has bitten me ever since I entered the Kampus... ;0)

The process of getting to our rooms was so smooth that by the afternoon, we had already arranged everything and were exploring the institute.. Some of them went to play football down the hill... Some went to the MF (margin-free shop)... If you ask even a finance guy from K what MF is, the first thing that will come to his mind is the "Margin-Free" shop.. :)

The architecture of the college is simply amazing. The rooms are fantastic, especially the valley-view ones… And the camaraderie at the institute is legendary.

Now what happened on that first day? Of course, we made ourselves comfortable in our rooms.. We explored the campus… But most of all, everybody was trying to converse and get introduced to everybody… In fact, even now, I might not remember the names of the people, but I would certainly remember that this was the person who met me on the first day and we played table tennis…

The institute is so well connected that despite the heavy rains here, I haven't ever felt the need for an umbrella... All the pathways are covered... (Except probably the hostels which have been newly made and which will be incorporated in the structure soon... I live in one of them and still I haven't felt the need) The academic area at the top, the mess nearby, the NC (Night Canteen), our beloved C hostel (yeah... the girls one) and the cluster of boys hostel, the Harvard steps on the entrance of the academic area, the amphitheatre, the Auditorium, the lush green gardens (where we can't walk :( Maintaining the beauty of the institute)... The clouds that you see beneath you when you get up in the morning... The rains here produce a sensational sight... Even a normal person becomes a poet... And when you are used to writing poems, what else would you do?

THE FIRST RAIN

A gale of mist touches my skin,
Dancing with the clouds, my hair grows thin;
My spirit is dancing with those of Gods,
And flowers being poured by trunks carrying logs.

Like first love which eliminates all needs,
Like how a mother seeing her first-born feels,
Like that first kiss disseminating her fragrances,
Such a heady feeling, those lovely trances.

I am happy today; I feel blood in my veins.
Mother Nature sends omens through thunderous rains;
My soul seems connected with the Milky Way,
May these cosmic drops encompass me every day.


I hope this will not reach the ears of our professors... But this has been created in class... :)